Family Bonding – The Little Things in Life That Make All the Difference


What is “bonding”?
Quality time vs quantity time-- you have probably heard the arguments. But the real issue is bonding.

Bonding is the key to the physical, emotional and spiritual growth of your children

Tasks associated with bonding aren’t always enjoyable.. but the bonding that takes place makes it all worthwhile

Why do we need to have “bonding time” with our children?

Parents need and want parents to spend much more time with them.

Parents have the greatest impact on their children's learning

Parents determine most of their child’s learning situations. They determine what language or dialect the child speaks, where the child lives, how the child will be educated, and what church or religious institution the child will attend, if any. For this reason, the importance of parent-child bonding is crucial for the child’s learning and well-being.

Parent-child bonding appears to be more difficult with each generation. Parents must work hard to spend more time with their children, teaching them their values and encouraging the children in their God-given uniqueness.


The Different “Bonding” Times

Children need to bond with parents and bonding takes time--lots of time.
Show your love to each family member. Let the members in you family know you love them for who he or she is, not for what he or she does.
Make a contentious effort to let the members of your family know that he or she is special. List at least three good qualities of each family member and post them on your refrigerator. Add to these qualities from time to time. And it doesn’t hurt to tell each other how wonderful they are.

Praise each other. Make positive comments about each other. It may not hurt to tell dad that you missed him or how good mom’s cooking is. Notice the positive qualities in each other and try to not focus on the negative qualities.


• Listen to the members in your family just don’t let it go in one ear and come out the other. When someone in your family shares something with you, give that person your undivided attention and listen carefully. Don't give advice unless asked for it.

Have family times. Have regular times for the family to have fun together, such as playing board or card games. Try to have as many family meals together as possible. Don't discuss problems or concerns during these times unless it is absolutely necessary.

Encourage family bonding time. Look for activities with the whole family can bond together and spend special moments together where everyone can feel close, a feeling of acceptance, and unconditional love from the people who mean the most in their lives.



15 Quick Tips for Family Bonding:

1. Whenever possible, eat meals together, especially dinner. Keep the TV off and do not answer the phone while dining.

2. Help them with homework (or review homework schedules).

3. Attend their sports event or activity (give positive feedback no matter the outcome).

4. Play card or board games of their choosing.

5. Watch a TV program that your kids like.

6. Have a family night out and go to a movie, concert, or play.

7. Exercise together (biking, swimming, tennis, hiking).

8. Volunteer together (serving meals at homeless shelters, building homes for Habitat for Humanity).

9. Do chores together (cooking, dishes, grocery shopping, housework, gardening).

10. Go on a family vacation and let the kids get involved in the planning.

11. Read together. If there is a book everyone wants to read, each person can take turns reading aloud.

12. Share a hobby together or take an active interest in your child’s hobby.

13. Have bedtime talks where you just sit and listen and let your children speak.

14. Pray together.

15. Every day, tell them you love them. Also, give a compliment or positive remark about something they’ve done.


The Importance of Christian Values and Your Role as Parents

None of us can lead a spiritually directed life by limiting religion to Sunday mornings. Nor can we expect children to acquire the attitudes, values, prayers, concepts, and preparation for Sacraments in a one-hour class held about 30 times a year.

Make the learning session loving, fun or rewarding. Don’t say: "You’d better have that Hail Mary memorized by now." (Say, instead: "Let’s see how far we can get with the Hail Mary this morning.")

Connect the teaching to real events Talk about the Mass or Scripture readings or the Eucharist on days that you attend Mass. Discuss moral issues, like lying or fighting, when there is an immediate reason to do so. These are called Teachable Moments because they make the learning less abstract and more real. Most of us learn better when we connect our learning to our lives.

Learn as you Teach. Every good teacher is a life-long learner

You have an opportunity to give your children a great gift – being fully present with them with your love, compassion, empathy, interest, sense of humor, playfulness, and affection. You have the opportunity each day, even if it is just for half an hour, to fully cherish them. They grow up so fast. Don't miss this opportunity each day.
If it is not important to you to just be with your children – talking with them, playing with them, taking a walk, holding them, listening to them, sharing love with them, gazing at them with love – then they will likely not feel loved by you. No matter how many things you buy them, or how often you tell them you love them, if they are not important enough to you to REALLY be with them, then it is likely they will not feel loved and cherished by you.


Remember, without love there is no healing. With Love, healing is foreseeable. Having a family can be a fulfilling and an exciting experience. Our family life is an important part of our life. How we treat each other and the respect we give each other will affect our relationship with that person and could affect how that person feels about themselves.

Families grow and change over time, so it’s important that we have the skills to be remaining close to each other able to keep our family relationships happy and healthy

The key to all of the above is scheduling, prioritizing, and much prayer.

And that is my plan for my future baby JASNY & baby Sajy